Last week at the Mandurah Ironman I popped to the toilets to have a pre-race nervous wee and somehow manged to drop my car keys down the toilet - one of those festival types. They hit the bottom of the bowl and kept on going.. I stood there in disbelief for a good 10 minutes. Luckily the organisers found a cleaner to come and help. She turned up with a bin bag and when I asked what that was for she smiled and told me I had to put my arm in it and dig for my keys. If I was lucky they'd be on the surface, if I was unlucky they would be underneath a solid foot of sh!t, piss and toilet paper. I was unlucky. Easily the most disgusting thing I've ever had to do. Ever. However I eventually retrieved my keys and received a round of applause from the small crowd that had gathered, intrigued by my predicament.
If you can beat that for stupidity I would like to hear your story, so I don't feel so bad.
Man! Ya shoulda sold tickets! 
I would have paid money to see that.
And pithed mythelf laughing all the way through.
I bet you dont hold your car keys in your mouth anymore while your arms are full unloading gear from the car to take inside.
I left my leggie at home a couple of times 
I didnt drop it in the sh!tter tho, nice work 
....But it was were I left it..but not down the toilet
stopping after a surf one day with a mate in the car to get some fuel for the silver bullet.
filling up an some mates who were also returning fro a surf, turn up and start using the pump across from me.
it's middle of summer and we're all standing shooting the breeze and this car of young lovelies turn up and start to refuel their car.
we're all talking and move into the servo to line up and pay
I notice the security cam behind the cashier, flick from a view of the pumps, to a view of the counter from the door to a view of the customer line from behind the counter.
i keep watching as we're all talking and making our way towards the cashier and every third flick of the camera view I see our group
then I notice me
and something on the front of my shorts
i wait for the monitor to flick round again
and I see it on the front of my shorts again
I talk over the top of everyone to get their attention and point them towards the monitor and when it flicks to a view of us, I say 'there, see it on the front of my shorts, what is it'
when one of the girls says 'it's your penis' and points to the front of my pants
I'd been going commando since getting changed from the surf, and my fly had been down and miniDoctor had been poking out saying 'hi' the whole time
I stupidly hid my car keys in a hole at the base of a tree while surfing .......Came back to find them covered in a heap of European wasps . .......Very painful
I used to work with a muslim guy. He took time off one year to do the pilgrimage to Mecca. Upon his return I was asking questions about his trip and how he coped with the huge crowds. One question I asked was how were the toilets he started laughing and went on to tell me they were pretty bad, imagine millions of people from all countries on earth crapping into holes in the ground. One of his mates accidently dropped his money clip into pit with about $60 dollars in it. He reckoned he would have left it but his mate reached in after it fortunatley he didnt have to reach down far as it was so full.
So after Zed thew his keys in the bowl and was disappointed, he figured out what the phrase really meant....
A mate of mine used to work for western power as a meter reader in Freo.
He decided one day to go for a surf at lunch time, parked his car and was getting ready and chucked his keys on the roof of the car. Just as he went to grab his keys to lock up a seagull swooped down and picked them up and flew away, he had no chance of getting them back. Stunned at what had just happened he decided to go for a surf anyway.
Back at the car he scammed a bit of change from a walker to make a phone call, to his wife who didnt believe him. By the time she had come to get him it was three hours later and his boss had been ringing him all afternoon trying to get hold of him.
His boss didnt believe him either, he was lucky to keep his job.
Funny thing is all his mates believed him, we know him well 
.....well down here anyways
I carefully removed a ( s bend ) from below a laundry tub once and then tipped its contents down the drain of the same tub.
A good bath in a tub of detol would be on the top of the list.
