I work as a plumbing contractor in a small community in Hawaii. I was finishing up a job a bit late today when someone I don't know called me complaining of two clogged toilets. Two clogged toilets? I said, you have a clogged main sewer line and I cannot fix it, you need someone with a main line sewer snake and there is only one person on this end of the island with that gear and he is the only one who can fix it.
No it's only the two toilets, everything else is fine he said. Sounds highly unusual I said, is the bathtub and shower backing up as well? No he said, they are fine. I said I can come out and run my auger thru the toilet but that is all I can do and it will cost at least $100, he agreed to this.
I have a really good sixth sense with regards to problem jobs and this one just didn't smell right, I went over several scenarios in my mind as I drove out there at 7PM.
When I got to the large property at a remote location there was a security guard just inside the gate, multiple vehicles and dozens of people walking about, WTF is this? When I pulled up at the house some guy with a walkie talkie came up to me and clued me in, apparently a reality TV show was being filmed with a bunch of young people stuffed into this big house.
I entered to find TV cameras and lights everywhere, water to the house turned off and raw sewage spilling out of two ground floor bathrooms and people walking thru it with no issues.
After augering the two toilets and turning the water back on it was quickly apparent the main sewer was clogged and/or the septic was full just like I told the guy on the phone before I came out.
Then I find out they hired some woman to try to fix it previously and all she did was shove a garden hose down a cleanout. I tried to explain the situation to them but they didn't really seem to or want to listen. I said they would need to call every septic and sewer cleaner on the island and offer big $ and someone would come to fix it. I put my tools away and approached the man who had called me and said that will be $100, he said "for what? you didn't do anything!" I was so mad I threatened to destroy the property with my truck (4X4), he relented and gave me $100 cash. HARSH WORDS WERE EXCHANGED.
I don't know exactly if it was the weird Hollywood attitude, the degenerate contrived TV morons walking about the house, the lack of respect for the rented property, the manner in which they were stupidly handling the problem, the way he lied to me, the lack of respect for local workers, allowing people to track raw sewage thru the house, probably all of it and just another reminder why I left California.
Slightly off topic- you need to update your toilets in the US. Why do you guys keep installing those toilets that clog really easy and need to have a plunger kept handy?
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
It was if I felt a need to be dramatic because they were filming.
Maybe they set you up, don't be surprised if they edit it to make you look really stupid.
(I hope they don't of course, is there any indication when it's shown on what station?)
Select to expand quoteBeersy said...
Slightly off topic- you need to update your toilets in the US. Why do you guys keep installing those toilets that clog really easy and need to have a plunger kept handy?
Not only that if you have big nuts they hang in toilet water
The thought of dropping a rather large cherry bomb with a long fuse down the dunny is the first thing that popped into my head.
Select to expand quotekiteboy dave said...Beersy said...
Slightly off topic- you need to update your toilets in the US. Why do you guys keep installing those toilets that clog really easy and need to have a plunger kept handy?
Not only that if you have big nuts they hang in toilet water
Lucky I don't have that problem!
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.
US designed toilets seem to clog more easily, don't know why.
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.
Yours fill half way or more with water, and rely on a vortex (cyclone) effect to suck solids down.
Ours fill only a tiny area at the bottom in comparison, just large enough normally to cover what you drop in there. Then they rely on water flow, rushing down the sides of the bowl, to wash solids down.
All evidence says the water flow action both is more effective and uses less water. And doesn't wet your junk or risk floaters touching it. 
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.[/quotBeaglebuddy said..
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.
us toilets are like a waterbirth. The water is so high you are in danger of it touching your schlong. Bad for splash but good for seeing how long you can lay the cable unbroken. aussie toilets deep and narrow.
$100 bucks wouldn't even get a plumber to your house in oz.
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.
Yours fill up with water and when flushed the water and waste is allowed through a valve.
Ours have a minimal amount of water and when flushed the water and waste is washed/pushed by the flow of flush water through an S or P trap. There is no valve, just a P or S trap.
Well, at least that's the way I think they work based on what I have seen in the USA.
Select to expand quotekiteboy dave said..
All evidence says the water flow action both is more effective and uses less water. And doesn't wet your junk or risk floaters touching it.
Not to mention there's a larger target area of porcelain in the Australian version to aim at for much quieter number 1s when you don't want the whole house to know you're taking a leak.
Select to expand quotePitbull said..
The thought of dropping a rather large cherry bomb with a long fuse down the dunny is the first thing that popped into my head.
now i understand keith moon's motives when touring in america.
Select to expand quotesn said..
Canadian dunnies are the same- and the water is damn cold.
stephen
they are deep though.
Salty
I suppose we just don't want to see skid marks on the inside of the bowl, either that or we like to measure our unbroken cable
Personally I never piss into the toilet standing up, I usually go outside but if it's raining too hard I will sit and piss like a woman.
When the piss from up high hits the water or bowl a fine mist of it rises in the air and settles on the toilet and floor surrounding 
The other plumber in town here just informed me he refered the people to me and they are from an MTV show.
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
... and this one just didn't smell right...
I bet 
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
When the piss from up high hits the water or bowl a fine mist of it rises in the air and settles on the toilet and floor surrounding
It splashes my legs, feels like I am pissing on myself.Select to expand quotesausage said..
Beagle,
I stopped feeling sorry for you after the words "in Hawaii" 
My first thought also
Where in Hawaii Beaglebuddy?
Select to expand quoteRex said..Beaglebuddy said..
When the piss from up high hits the water or bowl a fine mist of it rises in the air and settles on the toilet and floor surrounding
It splashes my legs, feels like I am pissing on myself.sausage said..
Beagle,
I stopped feeling sorry for you after the words "in Hawaii"
My first thought also
Where in Hawaii Beaglebuddy?
If it splashes your legs you are pissing on yourself
I live in Princeville on Kauai, not a great place to windsurf but a much better place to kite.
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
I live in Princeville on Kauai.
I'm off you
Select to expand quoteBeaglebuddy said..
I will sit and piss like a woman.
Bahahahahahaha!!!
Sorry
Select to expand quotephiln said..Beaglebuddy said..
What is the difference between the toilet designs? I have heard reference to ours having a larger water spot.
US designed toilets seem to clog more easily, don't know why.
Lawyers are bigger over there ?
Our effect corriolisis affect is stronger down here full on cyclone in the toilet. I normally piss the skid marks away
Select to expand quoteBennyB12 said...Beaglebuddy said..
I will sit and piss like a woman.
Bahahahahahaha!!!
Sorry
I can't believe it took that long for someone to comment on that one.
