Spoke to a mate last night for the first time since he tried to committ suicide a couple of weeks ago. Man what sadness in his voice, totally despondent, his recovery and future centered around coming to terms with and resolving so many issues that led to his decision to try and take his life. Nothing is the same, his family are hurting. To often we mask the reality with a mix of bravado and she'll be right attitude, with a lack of willingnes or knowledge to confront or talk about the issues and our vulnerabilities, it's a male thing. In this guy's life a paring back of what really is important, health, family and happiness with the material possession thing way back in the distance. Balance, I think is the key in all aspects of our lifes also we are all lucky to have surfing as a centering of balance that helps that focus , well at least in my life..... phew
I can relate, Ive been struggling with depression for the last 18 months. I wish I could find a "balance" but I cant seem to find my out of the fog.
Talking to my parents ect isnt really working and Im facing the fact that I will have to see somebody soon.
I have thought about taking my own life but I just couldnt do it to my family and friends and I actually have alot to live for.
This isnt a cry for help but just posting this is helping 
doggie, I am not a Dr of any description, and have not suffered from depression, so I only offer this in an attempt to help - perhaps your parents are too close to the situation, and/or not equipped to make an objective assessment and or provide meaningful advise.
Often I have received the best advice from colleagues or aquaintences - those that know me, but are not close friends (and do not know my close friends), as they tend to have an outsider's perspective...
Talking is definately part of the answer... so is typing on SeaBreeze!
Cheers GPA, trying to talk to the right person I think is the hard part.
I think this is why I may have to talk to a shrink to get the right perspective, you know that of a professional.
Im generally ok but like yesterday, massive bout of depression and didnt move from the couch all day. Its like you are falling and out of control with no way of stopping it. Its like its eating me from the inside and I just feel numb 
Once you start opening up and dealing with the issues is a massive step in the positive direction that will be dealt with over time it's pretty common this depression having had a bout of it and knowing lots of friends who have had it but the important thing to remember it is not insurmountable and once you get to the other side it's a total blast as control starts to happen in your life again, empowering to say the least
i just wrote a massive story about stress and how it affects people.
AND IT DIDNT F*CKING POST !!!!!!
now im stressed.
doggie, just run out and bite someone on the bum.
or,..maybe a better idea,..
you could run out and buy a copy of "The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle.
Available as a softcover book for about $25 or as a cd set for about $80.
The cd set (7 cd's) is worth it because you are more likely to listen to it over and over whereas with a book, you tend to just read once and forget it.
ANd you really do need to read or hear this stuff many times over so that it changes your natural way of thinking.
The basic message is that people tend to store up everything that ever went wrong in their life and continually replay it over and over rather than just live in the present moment and deal with the immediate situation.
Most of the stuff that depresses people is stuff that has already happened so you can't change it.
Once you have considered it, analysed what went wrong (or right) and taken lessons from it for the future, it's pointless dwelling on it any further.
What's done is finished with. Live in the present moment.
The other thing that depresses people is that they stress about future events too much. What if this, what if that,. most of which is wasted stress because of the many possibilities you stress about, at the most only one of them will be correct, and maybe none of them will be. So why stress about all of them?
So again, consider the future ocasionally when you are feeling up to it but then put that to one side and live in the present.
It's not easy because the mind is like a dog off the leash and continually chases after the worst posssibilities and dwells on those. It's wasted stress because you are ruining the present moment which is probably quite acceptable by dragging some other imagined event into the present, which probably wont occur anyway.
There's lots of other stuff in this book that can be of use in just keeping life in perspective.
And don't say that you cant afford $25 cos I wont believe you.
I can afford it
Thanks Pweedas that helps alot I will check it out.
I love Seabreeze 
Doggie,
Go see a doc.
I know somebody very close to me with depression and just having the medication made them a different person - at 1/8th the standard dose.
If you need anything give me a bell
I sit right into pweedas post,always dragging the sh-t from the past into my head daily and always worried about the future.
Good replies guy's I am reading with serious interest.
Mark what type of doctor did your friend see?
PS, Love ya like a brother Doggie 
My best mate has post depression (vietnam vet) He goes and see a shrinc and get medication, he is another man now and is not agro all the time....
Did not try to kill anyone for a long time. There is help out there and he told me that the biggest step he took is when he recognised he had a problem and went to seek help.
Onya for putting yaself out there doggie.
Easier in the short run to bottle it up and be all blokey but will hit you in the long run.
Best of luck down the track.. maybe try biting someone to see if that helps after all.
i live in a block of homeswest units,most occupants i'd say are borderline or fully depressed.
they suffer high/lows,are mostly on anti-depressants of some kind which compound their irritability i think.
keeping myself occupied daily with activity/sport of some kind is my way of not joining them.
i find in summer months when i'm exposed to greater amounts of sunlight [thru sailing] my stress and sleeping improve heaps.
finances,overwork a large cause of stress i see.
don't know the answer but going for a walk in nice surroundings helps a bit for me.
finding the drive to keep yourself occupied [doing activity you enjoy]would be my best advice,along with getting more sunshine.
despite the fact that some of us think a 6 pack is a support group ...it helps to stay off the turps......
i've pm'd you mate
But sometimes as doggie said,it stops you doing those things you enjoy,been in the same vote myself.
Doggie,
Hang in there, get help where you can, it will get better!
Some good advice from the other seabreezers here.
Btw, if you are looking at getting "the power of now", have a look on audible.com www.audible.com.au/?ref=Adbl_ip_rdr_from_US&ipRedirectFrom=US&ipRedirectOriginalURL=search%3Fref%3Dsr_lftbox_1_1 (not sure if this link will work). You can download it without leaving your couch for less than 1/2 the price of the CD set. On a sideline, you may even find other books there to help you on your way.
Peace
A good friend has been taking a mild dose anti-depressant for years. It works for her. No side effects. No crazed zombie. She's just better able to handle the little things that would have put her close to the edge in the past. If you need those things and they work for you then there's no reason to not do it.
For myself, I suspect I am borderline depressive. My brain automatically sees the down side of everything.
I get my jollies from playing and doing physical stuff. Kiteboarding, SUP, surfing, cycling. If I don't get my fun fix I get very down. If I do then everything is fine.
The only down side of all this is I need a bigger garage. Getting a new kite or board or a new bike is essential to my mental and physical health regime.
Thanks all, great advice and I think I needed all of it
To all that PMed me a very big thanks you know who you are
Hey mac I will buzz you in the next couple of days.
Cheers
Nathan
Hey doggie good on ya for recognising and your willingness to do something about it. As Mark said go to the doctor, they get to see people with depression all the time . It's not a big deal, get the right medication, get some good advice and you'll feel like a million bucks in weeks. I've had depression, it's ****, but it's easily treated. Make a start and you wont look back. I hope this doesn't come across as being like "I did this, I did that, so now you do this". I think I'll shut up now.
Hey Doggie, all good advice from the crew i recon. Another option may be an organisation called "Beyond blue" Its in VIC I know for sure ,and may be over your way too.
All the best and Kind regards James
I can relate with Gorgo,, need my fun fix to cope with life,, kite, surf etc.. Thnik I need the adrenalin..
Still pretty bad when I cant get out and about,, start renovating / cleaning etc
How do you guys cope?? What are you supposed to do?
Get him hooked in mate.Fixed my depression.
Only prescription is a board sail and wind. Im sure you can scrape up a old setup in the vic post
"i love windsurfing because im a better person "
Hey doggie and others: you have way too many activities in your profile to feel down.
On top of the med advices, you must get close to someone in all those sports, that you can confide to. Someone whom you see often, that can keep an eye on you.
Gotta find the right person to talk to - if it's not family, then someone else.
Draw a list of all good things and objectives that can happen to you - wind, climbing a right cliff, learn new sailing tricks, buy a bigger boat, get a promo, whatever. I'll bet you that list is long and healthy - for some people, this list may include relationships, for others, divorce .
All the best mate, hang in there, keep busy all you can.
Love & peace.
When you go and visit a quack for depression one of the first things they will ask is if you are eating properly. Now I do not know what comes first, depression or bad diet, but it would seem as though bad diet is a major contributor, as is alcohol. There are two tips!
And Beyond Blue is nationwide. Highly recommend!
I suffered anxiety for years. Started off a little thing and gradually got worse. Got to the point where it was a struggle to be anything approaching normal on any particular day. Absolutely the lowest point in my life. I know exactly what you mean when you talk about falling out of control 'cause that's exactly what I felt. I felt like I wasn't the same person anymore. Bad stuff. Went to see some shrinks, one of which told me I was also suffering depression. Hah! Who'd'a'guessed, I thought.
The shrink told me that to beat depression I needed to fill my life with things that make me happy. You can't be depressed when you're happy she said. Thinking back, I can see that for years I had been filling my life with lots of stuff that I felt I had to do and putting off all the stuff that I enjoyed.
To cut it short, basically anxiety and depression are linked. The same drugs are used to treat both of them. I changed my life a little and made a point of doing things I enjoyed. Not just big things but little things like reading a good book, playing guitar (hadn't played for years), took up sailing and boating (it's since become a big part of my life), made some great new friends, argued with idiots on the intraweb... 
Anyway, it took a while but it worked and over time I improved. I've got some scars but I feel as good as before if not better.
Remember you're a good fella, doggie. ENJOY your life, come what may. You're doing the right thing talking about it. Don't be afraid to go talk to your doc. The drugs DO work - I had a workmate who controlled his depression that way. I was just lucky that I managed to get over it without them.
Depression is a terrible thing. I'm sorry you are going through it Doggie and I feel sorry for your mate ockanui.
Stopping smoking has messed with my mind big time and I wouldn't be surprised if I'm not suffering from it now.
I think talking about it, and realising it would have to be a big step forward.
I've had dealings with a few of my friends in the past who have been suffering from it - I think it must be really common for men in their 40's, cause most of the male friends I know from my childhood are depressed.
