we love to have friends and family come to stay and with the silly season coming, living in paradise, near a beach - the bookings book is filling up....however...
1. farken hate being the personal chef to them all ( don't buy the **** and don't like whats on offer - the mexicans down the lane...fark)
2. four days is long enough people - after that who cares - love ya butt
3. clean the bathroom you grubby bastards (thats the ** stains) - still love ya mostly
4. (1. add on) if you do cook... ask everyone if they WOULD like some too - after all the food in the pantry WAS NOT bought with only you in mind - mum.
did i miss anything?
Lol, I think that you need to speak to said fam & friends, unless you want all of us to stay as well 
Christmas season is the time for caring, sharing and spending time with the ones you love the most..
Then after the nosh, push the bloated fkrs out the door and don't forget to write!
Dude... my in laws are coming for 2 FARKING MONTHS!!!! WTF is up with that sh!t?
I can't even stand them for an evening... well I couldn't when I last saw them 10years ago... But it still hasn't been long enough for me.
I really think I'm just gona have to dump the Mrs... she's starting to nag way too much anyway.
I could do 4 days but mine always come for 3-4 weeks... I even hate those guys you invite for dinner and they hang around til 1... dinner was over 2hrs ago, fark off.
We got conned into having one here recently and it lasted for three months.
He is a mate of my housemates godson from out Trundle way. What a Farking experience that turned out to be. I ended up having to be very brusque with him.
His piece de resistance, or what ever you call it, was taking a glass into the bathroom. It got broken and he swept it into the corner so he did not tread on it.
Needless to say, no rent or contribution. Told us he had a job. I came home early one day and realised he was still in bed. I must have woken him so he snuck out through the front door and came in through the back gate pretending he had been at work.
Gave the little **** a lift into town one day. My car radio is always tuned to ABC classical which I had on. He asked me if I could turn it down and before I answered turned it off!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
He got an earfull for that as well but I have reason to believe that it is a total lost cause.
Your original oxygen thief!
We have a constant stream of "guests" who are mates of or have befriended my older children in their various travels. Its a reciprocal situation where the hospitality than I can give is probably still in deficit compared to the hospitality that we have received. I don't mind forking out for food and beer but certainly appreciate whatever contribution these guests can make... often by entertainment in tales of their adventures or preparing a meal that is their specialty. I think that the actual nature of a house guest is a cultural thing and as much as I hate to admit it, the young well travelled American is an excellent guest. The last American guest jumped up from his seat when he saw me carting in a load of shopping and raced out to the car to finish unloading. Whilst unpacking the shopping he suggested that I had the ingredients for a fine curry that he could cook for us and if I could point him in the direction of a bottleshop and lend him a car he would pickup some beer to wash it down. The English on the other hand are a bit more reserved and will ask if there is anything that they can do rather than just pitch in and do it.
For my mind there is no one who has taken more than they have contributed.
sailhack...for now brother for now...ten years time...??
frant: that sounds awesome - i to have had some awesome experiences with our yank friends...to the point of us discussing joining the couch surfing website...anyone heard of it butt???
I think the record for us was eight weekends straight that people stayed at our house - all arranged by the Mrs. And towards the end the people from the early weeks were coming back!!!! WTF
Meant to become sudden best buddies with the husband / boyfriend and be the new uncle to the kids.
And all pretty well did fck all except eat and then wait to get fed again, sit around and ask stupid questions. Drink all your beer and wine, then contribute a six pack of Carlton Mid when all had run out.
Had to make up all sorts of excuses to escape to sister or parent's house. And actually looked forward to getting back to work on Monday morning.
All over now as I gave the spare queensize bed away and wheeled a piano in its place.
